Release The Veterans!

Chad says
This town is nothing but potheads
And sluts with too much class
To make money off their talents

Lewis says
For a town of white, country Catholics
He was surprised that most abide by
"Live and let live"

Cheslock says
This town is one giant sinkhole
To grow into a factory job
Is every student's goal

I say
We're all blessed this town is so bad
It makes us want to better ourselves
Then stab it in the back

Well I found nine or ten guys
And this one girl in third grade
Who could admit
They tolerated me
They're all spreading out
While I'm stuck in my bedroom
"And yes
This town's still the same"

So everyone is doing what they were supposed to do
I'm wondering how long before I cave in too
I'm grateful that these angels let me call them my friends
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to bed

Matt says
That he's sorry he's been distant
We grew apart, went separate ways
I hold nothing against him

Drew says
That she's running her own business
She says she misses me, 'cause it makes me happy
I say I miss her, 'cause she makes me happy

Abby says
She just wants someone who wants her
I guess that means unless you're fat
Or unless you really love her

Torres says
The English language is in my command
So here I am, wasting it
On a game of Simon Says

My double-digit years were spent intent on dying alone
Bailey would be better off
Without me forcing him to scream my cruddy lyrics
Into the microphone

So everyone is doing what they were supposed to do
I'm wondering how long before I cave in too
I'm grateful these angels let me call them my friends
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to bed

This year could just end and I'd still be a wreck
I have an addiction to caffeine and a hatred of sex
I can't even sleep through the night or be happy
Without taking a pill for the rest of my life

(This year could just end and we'd still be a wreck!
We have an addiction to caffeine and T.J. hates sex!
We can't even sleep through the night or be happy!
Without taking a pill for the rest of our lives!)

Inspiration: "All My Friends Are In Bar Bands" - The Wonder Years

"...Yugioh 5D's Fanfiction..."

This is the fanfiction to which I was referring. There are a few overlooked proofreading errors here and there, and sometimes the descriptions between the dialogue in certain conversations can be tedious, but all in all it's a great story. It was good enough to keep me reading all through last night, so that says something. Of course, a prior knowledge of Yugioh 5D's, let alone Yugioh in general, would be recommended to fully appreciate the representation of the characters and the interaction between them.

If nothing else, this is Akiza Izinksi, so you can understand why I like the anime and this fanfiction.

(Not just the breasts, but the hair is awesome, too.)

Beautiful Rose / Morning Star

I don’t see Nikai that much anymore

Every time I do

He’s sleeping on my couch

And he’s gone before I wake up

Dusty moved to Texas

I’m pretty sure he still lives there

I see his posts on Facebook

But we haven’t talked in years

The last time I saw Forest

He was still working at Kmart

Still talking about making movies

Still wanting me to help

The last time I saw Matt

He was on his way home from work

Thought our house was on fire

Wanted to make sure we were all okay

All the bridges I never burned

The planks are dropping one by one

Into the water underneath

I guess the damage is never really done

I never went to sleep last night

I read all thirty-two chapters

Of a Yugioh 5D’s fanfiction

Just to stroke my inferiority complex

And now I’m working 8 to 5

In a place where I cannot wear shorts

But you’re not an obese hopeless romantic

You wouldn’t know how much I hurt

I’m listless and abandoned

I doubt the ground I stand on

Sometimes I Feel Like Sam Kinison Reincarnated

Reruns of the past keep playing out before my very eyes
I'm watching shadows of our younger selves have snowball fights in the driveway
I'm watching the four of us sort Halloween candy on the dining room table
I'm watching Mom decorate for the holidays and sing along to all her favorite songs

My throat feels like I swallowed a bag of razor blades
And for the past two months, my soul has felt the same way

I'm standing on the cliff of a canyon that I keep filling up
With junk food wrappers and with receipts I never file
And I can't stop picturing that one day I will have thrown away enough
To simply walk across, then start to journey forward and away from the other side

Last night I lost my voice
Laughing with my friends
At all the jokes we crack
I never want it back
Cuz all I ever use it for now
Is to find ways to rephrase
How despondent I've been feeling
And I'm helpless to change it

And if I could stop shoveling my sorrow into these two-bit songs
Well then, maybe one day I'll find something worthwhile to say again

In Response To The Response To "SNL Hires Black Actress" Or Whatever The Ignorant Futsmud Used To Title His/Her Article

Inspired by the following post by a fellow blogger.

http://deafgirlmusings.blogspot.com/2014/01/a-different-approach.html

In case you felt the author was too harsh or biting (which she wasn't at all), here is a list of things she could've said but chose not to.

- As I finished writing this post, I worried I might offend the real minority, the Albinos. Then I realized I had nothing to worry about. It's not like any of them can afford internet.

- I'm not sure SNL would ever hire any Albinos or gingers anyway. Wouldn't the spotlights give them sunburn?

- I'm worried how many orange spray-tanned valley girls I've just convinced to go taste their black boyfriends' skin to see if they taste like chocolate.

- After reading the article, I was surprised to find out her salary was not coupons to KFC.

- Maybe the article title is not as offensive as we think it is. Maybe she asked them to use that title so she could keep collecting welfare.

- I've watched the actress grow up in her comedic career. She's not that funny, but I (and apparently SNL) take pity on her because she has no idea who her father is. Nor who the father(s) of her children are.

- Further down the MSN homepage, I read that the New York watermelon industry is projected to improve greatly in coming months. It makes sense, between all the skits they'll be used in and all the backstage snack tables they'll be served on.

- The black actress and the liver-spotted old man could never be in the same skit. She'd start licking all his spots, then be disappointed that they don't taste like liver, then somehow she'd take a deep personal offense to that fact and beat him up. Actually, if SNL is smart, they'll let that happen. Watching old people get beaten up and watching black people be themselves is always hilarious.

- I hope they don't let her write any of the skits. All the lines will be filled with grammatical errors, or be rendered illegible by grape Kool-Aid stains.

- Of course, the valley girls couldn't write the skits either. Assuming they can write in the first place, every other word would be "like", "you know", or some texting abbreviation they think is appropriate to use outside of a text message.

- Immediately after I read the title of the article, I thought to myself, "Well, I hope they fire her."

Memaw and Pappaw

When two vowels go walking, the first one does the talking. Arguably one of the most annoying things my grade-school teachers would chant, but it served its purpose mnemonically. It was supposed to help us remember that when a word has two vowels, or when a word has a vowel-consonant-vowel combination, the first vowel is pronounced long. Thusly:

"Memaw"

Pronunciation: mee-maw

"Papaw"

Pronunciation: pay-paw

"Memmaw"

Pronunciation: mem-maw

"Pappaw"

Pronunciation: pap-paw

The bane of the English language is that all of its rules have exceptions, but I'd love to avoid them whenever possible.

Arnold Palmers On The House

I've decided I'm not going to let it bother me. I'm really going to miss having her in my life, but she was never really in my life that much anyway - I mean, who was I trying to kid? "Better Luck Next Time", I guess? Is that the phrase that applies here? I really don't think I'll ever meet a girl quite like her, but the new girl wouldn't even know it if I did. I'd be somebody she'd say, "Hey," to once; and she'd be somebody that I couldn't stop thinking about and couldn't stop talking myself out of not being to stop thinking about her and could never bring myself to say anything more than, "Hey," back.

My point being, I realized there's a whole lot more going right for me in my life. I've embraced the fact that I'm good at drawing cartoons, not art. In a couple years, I'm shipping off to California to CalArt to learn how to make something of this talent. And if that falls through, there's always the band. H.H. and I are all the solid foundation we need to go somewhere with The Epitome Of Eureka, Lord knows I've got enough songs and he's got enough enthusiasm. And if that falls through, Ohio isn't such a bad state to live in. There's Wright State Lake Campus right down the road, I could stay at home and not pay room or board and not tearfully say goodbye to my parents until I'm 23. And if that falls through, there's always that series I'm writing that I've yet to finish the first book of. Having no job, no school, and no friends would definitely free up some time to get those four novels pounded out.

And if that falls through, there's always the Sko-Bo match I'm going to with good company. I don't think some of them would call me their friend, but I would call them all my friends. I'm going to enjoy today, because such a simple plan can't fall through.